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"Sharpest Lives"Written By: Miss Murdered Disclaimer: I don't own Gundam Wing – just
enjoy playing with the characters far too much Rating: NC 17 Warnings: AU, yaoi, m/m sexual relations of the
lemon variety, as near as a series of PWP as I can get (which is not
*that* near), bad language, violence, angst, sap, creative license
regarding law Pairings: 1x2x1 Summary: Heero and Duo are criminals travelling and committing crimes to escape their pasts and build a future over the Mexican border. A story of young love, sex and crime in a series of connected one-shots. This fic is a series of one-shots so they do not
feature direct continuity and were meant to be smutty and fun but
kinda transformed into something a bit more complicated as I wrote
them… The title is taken from the My Chemical Romance
song Sharpest Lives and each chapter is inspired by a particular song
(though I guess you all know that by now!) As always, this fic was beta-d by ELLE and it
is all down to her encouragement that a 5000 word one-shot morphed
into the 30k fic that it is today. " Sharpest Lives"
Part Five Save Yourself, I'll Hold them Back The light was beginning to fade as Heero stood leaning against the silver SUV, his arms folded across his chest and he was damn waiting. He assumed when Duo walked out of the motel room, he'd turn up. They'd done this shit before. That Duo had walked out, left the motel for a while and went to cool down. Yet he always returned within an hour or so. This was three hours. And the day was nearly over and tonight was the night they were knocking off the jewellery store - the store and the plan that was the fucking reason that Duo was not with him and had gone fuck knew where. Heero had no way of finding him. They didn't have cell phones unlike their teenage peers. They didn't Facebook or blog or whatever shit normal nineteen year olds did. Cell phones were traceable and despite the fact they could occasionally pick up pre-paid's and dump them, Heero didn't like the idea of any electronic contact between them. As Duo said, he was damn paranoid but that's how they'd gotten so far. That's how they'd not been caught and they'd not ended up in jail. He probably deserved the walk out. Duo always said relax. It was the word he damn hated but he couldn't relax even after he knew everything about the damn jewellery store they were stealing from. They'd cased it earlier in the week. The store was located on a road in the middle of their current small town surrounded by other non-descript stores - a deli next to it on one side, a book store on the other. It was called Zodiac for some reason and Heero had selected it as it was a small time place that had enough value to make it worthwhile for them to take down. They couldn't risk a multinational chain store, those had enhanced security, those had too many risks attached whereas this place only had the security cameras and the alarm he knew how to bypass. It was pretty simple. It made him wonder why no one had ever taken it down before when they'd visited to scope it out. As always, he'd let Duo do the damn talking as they approached the counter, the glittering rings and necklaces and whatever the fuck else glinting through the glass case. The woman behind the counter looked at them suspiciously - not that Heero could blame her with their frayed clothing and the way they looked. Heero looked back at her, assessing that suspicion and whether it would cause them any potential trouble as she watched them through a bang of dark hair. Duo gave her a grin and put an arm around Heero's shoulder, the contact making him awkward for one moment as they really didn't tend to do public displays of affection. Subtle looks. Subtle touches but nothing that betrayed the physical intimacy between them, all the fucking. But here, Duo had his arm around his shoulder and it felt damn confusing. Or it did until Duo began talking. "This is my buddy, he's gonna propose to his girl but she's so freaking demanding that we need some help..." Within minutes, there was a whole story of a pretty blonde chick with a dad who disapproved and how Heero had to make a damn good impression with the ring if the girl was going to say yes. It seemed that the story worked on the dark haired woman behind the counter, as now she was bringing out a series of rings from behind the glass and asking Heero all sorts of random questions about his imagined fiancée to be and he let Duo answer most of them. "He's just not a talker... ya know, Lu, and he's really gotta impress with the ring otherwise he won't stand a chance..." It had taken Duo all of five minutes to get the woman's name and all of five minutes more for him to have separated from Heero to look at the rings and begin joking that it was him that should be marrying the chick with all the interest that Heero had for ring shopping. He realised what Duo was doing, giving Heero chance to take in the security cameras, the security system and memorise his actions for the night they'd come back to rob the place. Had to admire that. That Duo always managed to figure out what Heero needed to do - that he needed some time to analyse and assess how they could complete the job with minimal distraction. That he needed to zone out of the conversation about princess cut and carats and shit he didn't understand to think about the alarm system. Twenty minutes later, they'd left, no ring purchased but Heero had a complete plan in his head and Duo had managed to convince the woman completely that he was nothing more than young and in love and shy. It was quite incredible how he did that - did that by being charming and funny and everything that Heero wasn't. Thinking about it now, standing alone in a motel parking lot, he saw how it proved that Duo was everything he damn wasn't. The extrovert, the one who hoped and dreamed, the one who laughed and smiled and so many other things... And fuck, he'd not thought about it but now that they were close, now that they were nearly at the border and the life they'd dreamed about for all this time, he found it difficult to understand why Duo would want to share it with him. Duo could have anyone. And he chose him. And it couldn't be all due to the damn time in juvie where he'd broken Trant's hand. It was that doubt that was probably the reason he was standing alone. Those dark thoughts. Maybe this afternoon proved that they wouldn't damn survive after it was done. Maybe they were too damn different, Heero thought, as he reached into the pocket of his jeans, bringing out the stupid piece of paper from that magazine from years ago. It had been crumpled and thrown at him. He guessed he deserved that. That Duo was distracting him, telling him that they'd done everything they needed to - they knew what they were doing and Heero did not need to sit with plans of the building he'd acquired illegally online from town records or that he did not need to look at how to disable the security system to the cabinets as he'd already done that so many times. No, he didn't need to but he wanted to be prepared - wanted to be ready for every eventuality. He looked at the image on the piece of paper and wanted to know the thing he'd never asked Duo. Yeah, he'd been fucking him since they were fifteen, he'd loved him since then or maybe it took until the hospital and sitting beside that bed for it to become love but he'd never asked why this was his dream. That it was a piece of advertising from some women's magazine, a beach side vacation with palm trees and two sun loungers and brightly coloured cocktails on a table in between them looking out over the sunset. It had said something to Duo - said enough for him to begin this life of crime with Heero and for it to be the goal. He'd just never asked damn why. And he knew it hurt Duo when he said that he thought they'd never make it - that Mexico was a fucking dream and that Duo was delusional for thinking that they would get there. That there was a border and they had those fake ID's but they'd get caught and everything wouldn't matter. "If it's all so fucking stupid and I'm so fucking delusional - why the fuck have we been doing this?" Duo had shouted. "We could've just stayed and I coulda bussed damn tables and earned fucking nothin' and you coulda worked construction and we coulda seen those assholes who tried to kill me every fucking day!" Heero heard the way his voice went louder and tried to step forward and grab hold of him but Duo was shaking his head and he reached for his wallet - bringing out that piece of faded paper. "Fuck you, Heero." He'd balled it up and thrown it at him - not intending to cause any physical damage but instead, it bounced off Heero's chest and ended up on the floor between them, broken, creased, damaged - that dream that they'd had - that they'd always meant to have now discarded on the floor. And Duo had walked out of the shitty motel room, slamming the door, without a key, without anything but that wallet, empty of the piece of paper that Heero now held in his hand. He should've said, "don't go." He should've said it was just his own pessimism. Explained to Duo that his life had been one moment of things going wrong after another as Duo could then understand - could understand that Odin had taught him that life wasn't fair. That things would never work out for him - that the only end game he saw of this whole life they'd lived - the sex, the drinking, the cons, the heists and the playing on the edge of the knife blade - would be jail for one or both of them. They'd said death by cop a long time ago, if shit really hit the fan, but Heero knew the reality was more that they'd end up behind bars. Heero contemplated his actions as he stood in the night air - he could take the store down by himself but the thought created a pain in his chest that was entirely unfamiliar. That the thought of Duo not being beside him physically made something ache. And all he wanted was Duo there beside him, his easy smile, those blue eyes, the hand on the small of his back reassuring and firm - the one constant in his life and the one person he'd ever had faith in. It seemed maybe wishful thinking worked or maybe it was just time. He wasn't sure but he couldn't help the feeling of his heart beating faster as he saw the familiar walk, the familiar slight movement of hips with every stride that was just as distinctive to Heero as his braid. "You came back," he said quietly as Duo joined him in front of the car. Duo had his hands in the pockets of his jeans and rocked awkwardly on his heels, one hand then went behind the back of his head, scratching underneath the braid, some kind of nervous tick. "Well... gotta keep you outta trouble, I guess." "I didn't mean - " "Naw, don't. You kinda did and I guess I shoulda worked it out sooner." Duo looked away and Heero looked down at the piece of paper as though it would repair what he'd said. That the small piece of bad advertising could be the dream again. "Duo..." he began to speak but the words would not form on his tongue, on his lips. As nothing came out, Duo sighed and the sound seemed loud in the abandoned parking lot - the sound from the nearby highway distant and indistinct and the sounds from the rooms vague. It felt like they were only ones in the damn world, in this stupid parking lot, and that nothing else mattered. "Ya know, I just wanna know - why did you bother doing all this shit if you never believed we were gonna make it?" Blue eyes blinked at the question, unsure of how to answer - he'd given up any chance of a potential normal life all those months ago to follow some idea of a beach in Mexico - he'd done so much for that symbolic piece of paper in his hand and he looked at it one more time before turning his gaze entirely on Duo's face and returning it to his pocket. "Because of you." He reached out and wrapped his hand around Duo's wrist tighter than he meant to but Duo didn't make a sound of protest or indicate that it caused him any pain. "Because you believed we would." "Fuck, 'Ro," Duo said quietly, raising one hand to Heero's face and touching his jaw gently. "You sure as shit put a lotta faith in my stupid idea." "It was worth it." Despite the fact the lot was empty and it was entirely unlikely that anyone would look out at the exact moment that their lips met, Heero hesitated even as their lips connected more chastely than their usual hasty moments of sexual tension. Sensing his reticence, he felt lips leave his own and Duo cocked his head in a moment of confusion. "We have the motel room until tomorrow morning," Heero said. There didn't need to be anymore words, instead, he let go of Duo's wrist, checked the silver car was locked and they walked back towards the room they'd stayed in for the last few days. Heero had cleared the motel room in Duo's absence, all traces of them ever having been there locked away in the car and ready to move on from another small town, another cheap motel room with yellow bed sheets and bad carpeting with undefinable stains. It was unhurried between them as they stepped through the door, locking it behind them. Heero was unable to define why it took time for them to be naked, jeans and t-shirts thrown to the floor and stripped slowly off sweaty skin until they were rolling slowly against the rough sheets, the friction between them a sweet torture and lips hardly leaving lips and hands connected. They'd never argued like that before - they'd disagreed and fought but nothing like that. And Heero had never told Duo explicitly that he did everything for him and while it was not some declaration of love wrapped up in bows with a princess cut engagement ring, it was something and it made him hold on tighter. When it came to that moment, the question wasn't about who was dominating who and when Duo slid into him, it felt different than any other time, the slow, sure movements of Duo's hips meeting his own, and it took more time than it usually did despite the frequency of their fucking. It was difficult not to reach out and touch every available patch of skin, wrapping the braid around his hand, demanding closeness after that argument - wanted to confirm that he had faith in Duo - that he was the only solid thing in his life and he could believe because he had to believe. "Fuck," Duo said, his head now down onto Heero's chest as his hips continued moving, his pace having increased and Heero's hands gripping tightly to his shoulders, nails digging in over the already scarred skin. His own fingernails marking him as their bodies moved together with more force, Heero meeting Duo's hips every time, that hard cock hitting his prostate, Heero's own dick sliding over firm abdominal muscles and the friction of it bringing him to close to coming. Duo raised himself back up and Heero used his legs, wrapping them tightly around his waist, and it felt deep and good, until his own hand reached down to wrap around his dick, replaced by Duo's before he could even start jerking himself off. He felt Duo come inside him, the hand stopping for a moment distracted by orgasm and then continuing each slick stroke until Heero came, hard, panting, Duo falling down onto his body and stayed there for what seemed like eternity. It was fully dark by the time they separated, showered, dressed in clothes no longer covered in sweat and were leaving the motel room. For a moment Heero stalled in the doorway of yet another cheap motel room, another place they'd stayed and left, before he turned off the light, leaving crumpled bed sheets and wet towels and no other markers that they'd ever been there. He wasn't damn sure why the thought made him melancholy, why they'd fucked like they had, but even as he drove to the town to lie in wait for the middle of the night, he wasn't quite sure. Maybe as it was the last job - the last time they were meant to do this and there was a weird sense of regret and there was the fear of it being over. At having enough money, of making it over the border, of beginning that new life that maybe they could have but as they waited in the car for three a.m. it felt like something was ending. Finally, three o'clock came 'round on the glowing clock between them and he reached over to touch Duo who'd fallen asleep some time ago. A part of him wanted to leave him in the SUV, that Heero would do it alone as this was the riskiest of all their jobs. This had security cameras. It was located in the centre of the small town. There was the potential for it to all fall down like a house of cards but he needed him - needed his expertise, needed more than that - wanted him there beside him as he gently reached out to wake him. There was nothing really left to say so instead, Heero leaned over in the car, kissing him hard, Duo reciprocating, tongue sliding into his mouth, for a second forgetting everything in the world and wanting nothing more than to return to that motel room and fuck him all night but they moved apart. "Stop thinking, 'Ro," Duo said, a slight quirk of his lips, repeating those words he said so many damn times. "Ready?" he asked. "Always, babe. Always." Heero reached for the bag in the back of the car and grabbed the duffle as Duo shoved his braid down the back of his hoodie before pulling up the hood to obscure some of his face for the cameras. The cameras would not be on long enough for anything to be seen - they were going to be shot out and Heero passed over a newly acquired gun to Duo as he felt for his own sleek weapon. They'd blow out two each before any useful images could be obtained. Duo knew guns - he'd been part of that damn gang - and when they'd first got a gun for their heists, Heero had taken him to shoot tin cans off the side of a highway. He'd expected that he didn't know how to fire properly. He'd not expected him to fire straight and hit all but one. Duo had just given him a cocky grin, clipped the safety back on and twirled the weapon around his finger. "Ya know, I'm pretty much awesome at everything," he'd said and reached over, his fingers threading through the hair at the back of Heero's head and bringing him to meet his lips, the gun held against Heero's back, the harsh cold metal felt even through the thin fabric of cotton. The memory suddenly felt like a mockery as they exited the car, leaving the engine running for a quick getaway and walked across the street to the store, the sign 'Zodiac' faded, and Heero looked cautiously around their location. Things had to be quick. Thankfully, Duo had spent his childhood breaking and entering - one of his more minor offences on the long rap sheet that was his juvie record - and Heero stood, securing the hood tightly around his own face as Duo knelt by the door - an old-fashioned lock, not difficult to pick and it was soon released, the door opening and the only hint of satisfaction was the smirk on Duo's face. It wasn't the time for witty comments, instead, only a wave of a hand that indicated "after you." And Heero followed, entering the jewellery store and raising his gun to take out one camera, the noise loud in the small space and accompanied by Duo doing the same - shooting out the other angle and turning until all four in the main store were nothing more than useless cases of plastic. It was then Heero approached the alarm system on the wall, the constant green light bright, and skilfully opened the metal panelling, quickly disabling the system by cutting wires quickly, the small tool kit of screwdriver and wire cutters making short work of the system. "Now," Heero said and the only answer was the smashing of glass as the cabinets were broken by the butt of a gun. The cash register was not their intention, it was the contents of the glass displays - all those diamonds and gold, silver and platinum - that they were interested in. It would take some time, a few towns further south and they'd find someone to sell to but it didn't matter - knocking out glass and putting the contents into the black duffle bag as quickly as possible, not looking at each other, instead just completing the task. The only sound was the clink of broken glass under sneakers and the movement of the jewellery being put in the bag. Heero felt like he could hear the sound of his own heartbeat, his own heavy breathing - wanting it to be over quicker but knowing in order to get anywhere near the dream of Mexico this had to be the last damn heist and that meant taking as much as possible. Enough to sell and start that new life. A wailing sound broke through the silence of the night and it startled him, making him stand straight and listen closely, realising suddenly what it was. This wasn't the bad neighbourhood that they'd lived in before Duo got the shit beaten out of him. It wasn't where they laid in bed and listened to the sirens and the gunshots, wrapped around each other for warmth in that uncomfortable, small bed. There weren't meant to be fucking cops. Duo had stopped his movements, their eyes met across the dark expanse of the store and Heero spoke. "Duo... Go. Take my gun and go." The sound of the cop cars had become louder - of course, maybe that was why nobody had tried this shit before. That maybe the alarm system that was visible was easy, old fashioned and damn antiquated but then Heero saw a red blinking light hidden behind the counter - a silent alarm that he'd not been aware of. The silent alarm that had alerted the cops the moment they'd stepped through the door. Fuck. Duo stalled, blinked and looked at Heero even as the noise of the approaching sirens got louder. He took the gun Heero thrust in his hand automatically, his own secured in his back jean pocket but he hadn't damn moved. "No. We go together, you fucking idiot!" "No, get out of here. Drop the gun, drive the car, burn it and get out of here," Heero said, his voice sounding like he was giving out orders. "The fuck? I am not leaving you here, 'Ro." "If we go together then they'll catch us. If I'm here alone, they'll arrest me and you can get away." Duo shook his head, a look of pure stubbornness on his face and he reached out to touch Heero but he flinched from it knowing that even a moment of physical contact would be torture now. That there was no time. "Go," he said firmly. "No! You said we'd go down together, asshole." "I can deal with prison. You can't," he said, hating himself for the harsh truth and the look on Duo's face at the suggestion. It had been a damn joke - that Duo was too pretty for prison but that's why he'd taken the shit in juvie. The hair had made him a damn target. That's why it had all started. "Now go." "Heero..." "Damn it, go!" Heero looked down the street through the glass, felt like he could see the flashing lights approaching and the moment Duo took hold of his head surprised him - the feeling of his hand at the back of his neck and the contact of lips - automatically closing his eyes, hearing whispered words against his dry lips. And then the feeling was gone and Duo was running towards the car and he was watching Duo go - watching the stupid silver SUV - and made a plan in the short time it would take until the cops arrived to arrest him. He attempted to run, he wasn't that fucking stupid to just stay where he was, and ran through the streets he didn't know. Running in the opposite direction to where Duo had driven off - had to stall and give him time. When the cops got him, pushed him hard against the harsh brickwork of a wall and cuffed him, they found the only thing that remained in his pockets - the image of that advertising thing, the beach in Mexico, and all he could do was damn hope and have faith in Duo. He hoped that Duo would get away, that somehow he'd get that dream, thinking about it as they pushed his head down hard and forced him into the back of the cop car. Heero wanted to touch his lips, the ghost of that last kiss still felt against his, and he wanted to reach out and feel those words but couldn't due to the damn cuffs around his wrists. The words echoed in his head, quiet and subdued as he was driven away. "I love you, 'Ro." But it hadn't been enough. Never had been. They were fucked from the beginning.
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